Category Archives: insanity

Twelve Yesterdays

14 Tuesday Jun 2016

Posted by in Assault Rifles, Ban Assault Rifles, Gun Control, insanity, Orlando, Uncategorized, Yesterday,

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Yesterday, I wrote to twelve close friends asking them to please sign a petition and forward it to twelve others. I got one reply saying that she’d signed and forwarded it along. The petition simply said “Congress should reinstate the federal ban on assault rifles.”

My daughter Emily’s Sunday evening blog post after the  horrible Orlando tragedy was entitled, “I’m Sorry, But Your Statistics Don’t Matter.” She ends her post with this; “Enough is enough.”  I offered the petition as a way of trying to begin to make the change. She is right, enough is enough, and as her mom, I want to cheer her on.

When Emily was in high school, she’d run in a track meet at Columbine High School. I was sitting in the bleachers with my 13 year old son and my 90 year old grandmother cheering her on. Our lives were affected by that shooting but we’ve had 17 years of tomorrows. The twelve students who died that day only have yesterdays.

It was for those twelve students that I picked twelve people to send the petition to. It is time for a change. If we can’t reinstate the ban on assault weapons, we have to figure out a solution that can be achieved. Maybe we have to ban the ammunition. Let’s figure this out people. Let’s honor the fallen.

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What Matters Most

19 Thursday Nov 2015

Posted by in Brain, insanity, Love, Mental illness, Uncategorized

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Yesterday was one of the hardest days of my life. I am sixty; there have been a few really bad days, a dozen or so incredibly amazing days and luckily, a life time of regular ones. Having a younger sibling with terminal cancer has shed new light on the joy of ordinary and the idea of what matters most.

My sister and I spent the day with one of our brothers. We started with the radiologist, next was the oncologist. The news that a significant part of his brain tumor was not able to be removed was officially revealed to us and for that moment, understood by our brother. He needed time to process all the information, but when you are told your probable ‘Expiration Date’ and it can be measured in days, time has a new meaning.

He is dying. He has a 12 year old and a 15 year old. He wants to spend every possible remaining moment with them. He has a book he is trying to write. He has songs he has written and recorded and wants to finish them. Where does one start? Turmoil shoved his cancer strained brain closer to insanity.

Struggling to help him, I suggested that he try to keep things simple. We talked about how things fell apart for our family when dad died and then again when mom died. He said that for him, the single most important thing was to make sure his children got to stay together. That one thing was what mattered most. Family has to stick together.

What matters most is truly what matters most. Help the person simply remember what matters most to them. With all the medical information and dates and schedules being thrown at them like giant hail stones in a thunder storm, help them try to keep things simple. If they don’t want to go through radiation and chemo therapy, honor their request.

When you can measure your remaining life in days, it matters. Put aside everything and listen. That is what matters most.

Compassion Heals

06 Friday Nov 2015

Posted by in compassion, insanity, Mental illness, misdiagnosis

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Where does the spiral into insanity begin?
When does the real whacko/ lunatic reveal its well-disguised, twisted face?

Can a sibling recognize the hijack, an episode or event when your misunderstood, pot-head brother’s behavior altered drastically; when his brain became overwhelmed by the invading intruder. How often is legitimate mental illness caused by an undiagnosed medical condition?

So you have a really bad headache; so bad that you go to an emergency room – three times in three consecutive months. Then you begin to lose your balance and your vision. Not like when you are super-stoned or stinking-drunk, a different category of impairment. Not fall-down, rum-dumb babbling. Not seeing-double drunk. Different.

You convince anyone still willing to listen to your chronic, nearly non-stop complaints about constant pain, to take you to a Different Hospital. For whatever reason, this hospital’s ER does an MRI and finally, you have an answer: a brain tumor. This tumor is malignant. This cancer is aggressive.These odds are not in your favor. How many others suffering with schizophrenia-like behavior (a.k.a.crazy) have brain tumors?

Our great-aunt was institutionalized in an asylum in the ’60’s. I’m old enough to remember going to pick her up after she’d had electro-shock therapy. I now ask myself if she had a brain tumor too? Was it another tragically missed diagnosis/misdiagnosis?

Mental illness is real illness; usually ignored and often misunderstood. If you are fortunate enough to have mental health, don’t judge; show compassion. It heals us all; the giver and the receiver.